The Case Against Zero-Sum Thinking

Shift out of zero-sum thinking and into a mindset that makes room for everyone to thrive. Explore practical ways to lean into interconnection and build mutual growth.

So, the way things are set up a lot of the time, it’s like the world tells us there’s only so much to go around, right? Whether it’s money, attention, or opportunity, we’re kind of trained to believe that if someone else gains something, we lose something in return. This idea known as zero-sum thinking has seeped into how we talk about money, politics, and even personal stuff like friendships or family dynamics. But maybe this belief is missing something big. Maybe, instead of being separate from each other, we’re actually all tangled up in the same web. That’s what I’ve been looking into for years now, and honestly, what I’ve found out could really shift how you see yourself in relation to everyone else.

Why Zero-Sum Thinking Feels So Simple

At first glance, zero-sum thinking kind of just makes sense. It tells us: if you get more, I get less. That’s it. Pretty clean and straightforward. This mindset pops up in offices where folks race for credit, or in families where it feels like love or money is doled out unevenly.

That piece in The New York Times not long ago talked about how this mindset runs deep in our culture. And you know what? It totally does. It feels comfortable in a weird way, like, if you think the world’s a competition, then it explains who’s winning and who’s getting left behind. It even gives a little logic to selfishness and big national slogans like “America First,” acting like being part of the global picture means you’re somehow losing your home team advantage.

But here’s the catch: study after study keeps showing that zero-sum thinking isn’t usually based on facts. It’s more about perception than how things really are.

What’s Underneath the Fear

Honestly, I think a lot of this comes down to fear. Fear of not having enough, not being enough, or just vanishing into the background altogether. That fear makes us want to draw lines—me versus them, us versus them, mine versus yours. And yeah, that’s old survival stuff. It’s how we protected ourselves back in the day. The trouble is, we’ve built whole systems and belief structures on top of that fear.

Now that we live in this interconnected world where resources are more complex and we’re way more dependent on each other, that old mindset might be creating the exact scarcity it was supposed to protect us from.

Maybe Everything Is Connected

So, let’s flip it. What if the real truth is that we’re all part of one giant system? It’s not even a new idea. Take Indra’s Net, this image from Hindu and Buddhist stories, it’s like a huge net filled with shiny jewels at each point, and every one reflects all the others. That’s us. What touches one person eventually ripples out to everyone else.

And no, that’s not just pretty talk. You can see it in the real world. Like when communities make sure every kid gets a good education, the whole area sees fewer crimes, better jobs, and more home value. That’s not just feel-good stuff, Economic Policy Institute numbers back it up.

Or take cities that stop treating homelessness like an inconvenience and start treating it like a solvable problem. Places get cleaner, shops do better, people feel safer. UC research even showed that housing people saved the government money overall, mostly by cutting back on hospital visits and arrests.

Then there’s public health. Protect the folks who are most at risk, and you end up protecting everyone & it’s exactly what we saw during the big health scares in recent years.

Helping Others Helps You Too

The Dalai Lama once said something along the lines of, “A smart selfish person helps other people.” That might sound weird at first, but there’s real wisdom in it. Turns out, looking out for others isn’t just the kind thing to do—it actually makes your own life better.

Even Adam Smith didn’t think it was all about selfishness. He talked a lot about empathy and moral feeling too.

Now more businesses are starting to catch on. Companies that care about their employees, communities, and the environment often end up doing better financially than the ones that just chase short-term profits. That dog-eat-dog culture? It’s kind of falling apart under its own weight.

Ways to Start Thinking Bigger

Knowing all this stuff is one thing. But switching your brain out of that zero-sum mode? Totally another. Still, there are some things you can actually try that help shift your thinking a bit:

• Catch the Tight Spots: Watch yourself in moments where you feel protective or tense—like when someone else’s win feels like your loss. That’s often a signal. I’ve started keeping a little notebook just to track when those thoughts pop up. Even just noticing them helps create space for new ways of thinking.

• Give When It’s Hard: Giving something up when it’s easy doesn’t shift much. But giving in the middle of feeling possessive? That’s where the change is. Maybe it’s shouting out a colleague who’s up for the same promotion. Or sharing something useful with a rival. It shifts how we relate, both to others and ourselves.

• Question the Story: When someone says something like “if they win, we lose,” stop and ask…is that even true? Like with immigration, where people act like newcomers are stealing jobs. But actually, they often add to the economy. So who’s really losing? Maybe no one. But that story keeps getting passed around.

• Feel the Connection Directly: You don’t have to be a meditation guru. Just sitting still for a few minutes, or walking through the woods, can pull you out of the whole me-versus-them mindset. It helps blur that boundary we’re always trying to draw between self and other.

• Speak Up When the Story's Off: You don’t have to call people out harshly, just ask better questions. When someone frames things like a tug-of-war “If they get more, we get less” try something like: “Could both groups actually benefit here?” That can open up bigger conversations.

Making It Real

This isn’t just a brain shift, it changes your everyday life. You stop seeing other people as threats to your worth or success. Work becomes something where everyone’s contribution counts. Even emotions like jealousy or anxiety start to feel less solid when you realize they’re built on a story of separation that doesn’t hold up.

Stuff like climate change? It stops feeling like someone else’s problem and starts to feel personal, because it is. We’re all in it.

Stepping Out of the Scarcity Mindset

With things feeling more divided than ever, maybe the old ideas about competition and scarcity just aren’t working anymore. The truth is, we’re in this together. Systems that recognize that tend to work better—both in nature and in human communities.

It’s not a question of whether we’re connected. That part’s already real. The real question is whether we’re going to live like that connection matters.